Yesterday I went to sleep, thinking I'm doing alright. Today I was supposed to wake up at 6 to meet with my future colleagues and drive to the site where I'll be working. I woke up at about 3:30. I had a knot in my stomache. I just had waves of anxiety going over me. I kept tossing and turning, trying to go back to sleep, listened to a relaxation audio, but I couldn't concentrate.I tried using the tips I read about but it didn't seem to help. Then my mom came in the room. She was up too. And I just burst into tears. I am so afraid to start a job. I am so afraid to fail at it. I am so afraid to change anything. Not just anything, I'll have to change everything! What I do, where I live... I'm petrified that I won't cope and the bad thing is I'm already not coping too well with all this.
Shit, what did I get myself into? I don't think I am ready for this job. I never even wanted to work, but everybody was saying I needed to find something to do. Now I'm getting worse again.
Shit, what did I get myself into? I don't think I am ready for this job. I never even wanted to work, but everybody was saying I needed to find something to do. Now I'm getting worse again.
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